In memory of my brother. Another birthday in which there is no cake.
My brother and his trusty Bic lighter.
The boy in the photo above is my brother Tom. My mother named him Thomas, but we all called him Tommy. At seventeen he dubbed himself Tomas (pronounced toe-mas, accent on the second syllable). He took to wearing sunglasses and being quietly mysterious. It was the first of many personas he would try on for size while looking for how he fit in the world.
It wasn’t easy for him, figuring it out. He had a handicap from the start: Youngest of seven; born colicky, and needing a lot of soothing in a busy, boisterous family. He was often lost in the fray.
At two he fell through the heating vent in the bedroom floor, bumped accidentally by another brother as they jumped on my parents’ bed. He landed in the dining room below, barely missing the table. Astonishingly, other than…
View original post 664 more words
A Wilderness of Words 
Beautiful tribute, Mary. I absolutely love your photo of him.
Sending virtual love and hugs your direction. Wish I could do or say more. xo
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Michelle. I love that picture, too. He was about 15 or 16, playing with a Bic lighter. We never stop missing the people we love, do we?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Never, ever. My husband and I giggle whenever a certain song comes on the radio out of the blue. It’s our friend nudging his way into the couch space between us, making sure we haven’t forgotten him. AS IF that could ever happen.
I am truly sorry for your loss. I loved that you shared his spirit with us.
LikeLike
I miss him too, and I never met him! Happy Birthday! ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
You are so sweet, Jen! You would have liked each other, I’m sure.
LikeLike
I don’t doubt that a bit! 🙂
LikeLike
I wish my dear brother a happy birthday, because I know he is happy where he is and has been for 17 years., with a brother @ sister.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Have to say it again, Amy — YAY, you! (You know why.) Love you.
LikeLike
I agree we never stop missing them. Not ever. I’m sorry.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you. I think it’s a measure of our humanity and capacity for love that keeps us missing our loved ones after they’ve gone.
LikeLike
I’ve been thinking about Tom all day. He is never far from my thoughts!!!!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Touched – again – by this piece. Thank you! During this past week, Martha and I have been thinking a lot about Tony. Helped to read your reflections.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Lois. I’m glad if reading this gave you a measure of comfort over your loss. There are many times I think of Tony and his mega-watt smile; so many times I wonder at what he would have become. He was really something special, your brother.
LikeLike
I know, Kathy. Love you!
LikeLike
What a tender, sweet tribute to a tender soul.
LikeLike